
What does time do for a broken heart?
What does time do for a journey of grief?
After writing my book Where Is Joy? I can share a few things I’ve learned about time.
- The rawness of pain fades slowly.
- The passage of time does not diminish memories or missing my daughter.
- It took years for my heart to heal.
- Healing does not mean my heart returned to same state as before April 13, 2002.
- Healing from grief is not a gradual improvement; it’s two steps forward, then one step back.
- Or it’s 20 steps back, and I’m flat on my back on the couch.
- It takes more than the passage of time to heal.

It took a network of supportive friends and family, research and locating helpful tools, the practice of quiet moments for Bible study, prayer, and communion with the Father.
- Healing required me to learn and accept my limitations. I was a slow learner in this area because just when I thought I could move ahead, I was reminded that everything had changed.
- I am not the same person.
- Time helped the rawness of pain, but I had much to learn in my journey of grief.
In time I learned to be thankful for even the hard things in my life.
Today I am thankful for
- the people who supported me through all the years of healing
- the lessons I learned about God’s glorious grace and love
- the ability to look back and reflect — to see God’s hand through 17 years of my journey
JoyMartell